For whatever reason, your relationship or marriage is over. Maybe it’s been a few months, and you are starting to feel the urge to get out there and mingle—but you just aren’t sure. Even after a year, you might doubt whether or not now would be an appropriate time to put yourself out there.

This is the reality for many people who are single and out of a serious relationship or marriage. Is it soon to begin dating again? Will my children be okay if I start seeing someone again? Will things that happened in the past be destined to repeat with a new partner?

Thinking about those questions and more can make the prospect of dating again feel daunting and too much. But, really, how soon is too soon to start dating again?

What to Remember About Dating Again

Chances are, it has been a while since you were last out there dating. No matter the length of time it has been, it will almost feel like it did at the very beginning of your dating experience.

We would love to be able to give you a straight answer at the exact time when it isn’t too soon to date again. Because truthfully, this is all based on your individual life and what is right for you. However, we can most certainly give you some tips on what to consider when you are thinking about dating again.

Are You Healed From The Past Relationship?

We carry a lot of baggage with us from the past, and sometimes we don’t realize that. So one thing to think about is to decide if you are fully healed from the past. If your relationship or marriage ended because of an affair, you could be distrustful about the possibility of it happening again.

That is certainly justified. However, if you have too much fear about the past repeating itself, it could mean that you haven’t been able to let go of it fully. You don’t have to accept that bad things happened to you in a past relationship. However, it is healing to understand that the past isn’t always doomed to repeat itself.

Your Desires For The Future

Think about your future life. What does it look like? Are you married again? Do you keep things casual with dating for a while? Do you have children (or want more?) Where are you living?

Thinking about the future can help you potentially decide who you want to invest your time in. At some point, most people do want to settle down and get into a serious relationship. Making sure that you match up with someone whose values, wants, and needs align with yours can help you decide when the right time is to begin dating again.

Still Trying to Figure it Out?

Dating is hard, no matter when you are doing it. Whether it is a month after your last relationship ended or two years—it can be challenging to decide when you want to begin dating again. If you are hesitant to begin dating again, it might be due to you being stuck in the past for some reason. It’s also a lot to consider when you are trying to decide what you want your future to look like with things you can control.

If you are at this point in your life, don’t hesitate to reach out to me for relationship counseling. Anxiety therapy may also help you quiet some of the worries that you have about dating again. Together, we can talk about how to help you move forward so you can feel prepared and 100% certain you are ready to date again.