Our differences aren’t often celebrated. While we should marvel at a world with such diverse walks of life, it often divides us as a society. If you have a partner from a different ethnic or religious background, you see this value and probably celebrate the diversity.
However, that doesn’t mean conflicts won’t arise. The holidays can heighten and elevate differences within families as long-held traditions and expectations can be placed over personal feelings. Even though you celebrate the diversity of your relationship, the traditions of one religion might come in conflict with another. With so many major holidays from multiple faiths coming up or starting, it can feel like a never-ending battle.
Despite your differences, a harmonious holiday season is still possible. Here are just a few ways to achieve it.
How to Enjoy the Holidays as an Interfaith Couple
When you practice a different faith than your partner, it can be really hard to imagine a world where they can coincide peacefully during the holidays. This likely isn’t the first time the topic of religion or faith has come up, and it won’t be the last.
Communicate With Each Other
Communication is crucial for every couple, regardless of their religious background. However, we can’t stress how important it is during the holidays.
Express curiosity towards each other’s faith. While you might not fully understand the intricacies of certain traditions, you can show curiosity towards them. After all, these traditions and beliefs are a huge part of your partner and likely how they were raised. Don’t be afraid to ask each other questions about the traditions of their faith. Openly talking to each other about the differences in your faith can ultimately bring you closer together.
Some important topic discussions:
- What are the most important traditions for your faith?
- How do you celebrate with family?
- What dates does your family have things planned so I can coordinate with my own?
Inevitably, there will be things that you just can’t agree on. For some couples, this can be a major point of frustration. However, to avoid becoming too heated, agree to disagree on these matters.
Above all else, be respectful towards one another! You might not be able to see eye to eye on everything, but that doesn’t mean you need to be disrespectful.
Start New Traditions
Every faith is steeped in tradition, especially during major holidays. When it comes to each other’s families, there might not be a lot of wiggle room. But that doesn’t mean you can’t develop new traditions for your own household/relationship.
There is nothing wrong with creating new traditions that blend each other’s faith. There are so many different directions you could take this. You could have a dinner combining traditional dishes from both cultures or faiths. Or, maybe you put up a Christmas tree with ornaments pertaining to both your faiths.
There’s no right or wrong answer to how you choose to celebrate the holidays with each other. It might initially feel uncomfortable, but it can help you grow stronger. This can be a great way to get the kids involved if you have any. You can immerse them in the traditions that both of you hold dear, which will help them honor both.
Still Tense During The Holidays?
Maybe the holidays have always been a point of tension with you two. If that is the case, you are not alone in this. Many couples struggle to find ways to honor their faith while still respecting their partner’s faith. If you are struggling during the holiday season, you don’t have to continue to add tension during these times. Reach out to learn more about couples therapy and how I can help you honor each other’s faith.