It’s all territory that has yet to be charted, this social media business.

In terms of relationships and setting boundaries, the digital era we’re in has created a social media challenge.

Online activities might seem like a juvenile and almost trivial thing to cause problems in relationships, but they definitely do. How so?

The social media challenge basically surrounds seedlings of distrust and misinterpretation. You think you know and trust your partner only to be completely caught off-guard by something they did on social media.

In approaching this challenge, it’s important to set boundaries within your relationship.

Here are four tips to get you started.

1. Establish A Social Media Checkpoint

Do you remember Checkpoint Charlie? It was the crossing point between East Berlin and West Berlin during the Cold War. No one crossed over except by way of Checkpoint Charlie.

It might seem odd to relate your own relationship boundaries to a wartime checkpoint. Although your social media challenge isn’t as solemn, it’s just as important to the survival of your relationship.

With Checkpoint Charlie in mind, remember that transferring any bit of real-life information to social media is like both of you entering into another zone. If your partner is more private, they might not appreciate this exposure.

So, before posting, run your post idea by your partner. Make sure you get the okay before venturing into the social media territory with your personal lives.

2. Use Real-Life Boundaries as Your Online Guide

The tap-tap-tap of your computer keys can be much more comfortable than an in-person experience. Many people feel more bold and brave behind the safety of digital walls. What this can mean is that your online activity might appear somewhat out of character.

This notion makes it easy to blur boundaries on social media.

One way to prevent this from happening is to use real-life boundaries as your online guide. Ask yourself if you would say the same thing face-to-face. If you wouldn’t, then don’t say it online.

3. Take Off the Trench Coat

If you’re like most people, you’ve come to realize that social media is a plethora of easy to come by information. Many people assume that privacy settings protect their valuable information, but that’s often not the case. This is a social media challenge in and of itself.

Armed with this knowledge, it might be an enormous temptation to check up on your partner and even spy on them. If you feel the need to do this, then obviously, there are bigger trust issues that need to be addressed.

While in the business of playing unofficial detective, you might be tempted to ask your partner for their login information. The thing to remember is that access to their profile isn’t going to fix trust issues.

Rather than donning a trench coat and commencing spy-mode, try setting other boundaries. For instance, don’t even follow each other on social media, but simply commit to giving one another digital space.

4. Take One Step Back and Two Steps Forward

Much like texting or emailing, a common social media challenge has to do with the way you perceive tone. Regrettably, it’s difficult to gauge how something is being said when you’re just reading words. Even with an array of emojis, you can easily misinterpret tone.

Rather than jumping to conclusions about your partner’s social media activity, be direct and ask them about it.

Think of it this way, take one step back from your immediate assumptions. Talk with your partner about the online activity in question. Then, use the connection made during that conversation to take two steps forward in your relationship.

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If you’re ready to take your relationship to a deeper level of trust and intimacy, please contact me. I’d be happy to work through any roadblocks you might be facing and support you as you pursue a happier and healthier romance—even in the face of social media challenges.