At different times—while growing up, maybe, or after moving to a new city—you might have felt envious of the person who could strike up a conversation with anyone, drawing endless observations about the weather or a ball game from thin air. Maybe you wish you had the confidence to chat with the person sitting beside you on the plane. It’s possible you’ve wondered if life would be easier or happier if you were more comfortable chit-chatting with others.

Recent research conducted at the University of Arizona suggests that while the chatty person you know might be perfectly happy, your shot at feeling satisfied and rewarded is just as good. Why? When it comes to conversation and your happiness, quality matters much more than quantity. Talking with someone else about things that matter could be a crucial component of feeling truly at peace.

Why are meaningful conversations so important?

The meaningful life –Researcher and thinker, Martin Seligman, talks about three different ways of pursuing happiness: through pleasure, through engagement, and, finally, through meaning.

You can also think about conversations—and the relationships behind them—in the same terms. Chatting about the weather might be pleasurable enough, but when you’re feeling stressed or disillusioned, talking about meaning and importance with another person strikes much closer to the heart of who you are in the world. The conversations you have can profoundly alter how you see things, not just from what you talk about, but as a result of how a meaningful conversation can make you feel: seen, heard, and deeply rooted within your own life.

“I wish I would’ve expressed my feelings” –Bronnie Ware, a nurse who cared for the dying, wrote a book about the most frequent regrets voiced by those who didn’t have much time left. She found that many people wished they’d been courageous enough to unearth their feelings and share them with someone else.

You can probably think of more than a few situations in which you had something you wanted to say, but you bit your tongue. Maybe you were worried about offending someone, overstepping a boundary, or opening yourself up to hurt. Meaningful conversations take courage; they often involve sharing sacred or uncomfortable feelings. Yet the reward of feeling deeply connected to yourself and to another outweighs the risk.

A good listener –Meaningful conversations aren’t just valuable for what you say; deep discussions teach you how to listen. Listening draws you out of yourself. How is the person who’s talking to you feeling? What is he afraid of? What does she feel like her life is missing?

When life feels confusing and you’re not sure what you’re doing, listening gives you purpose. When you’re committed to hearing, you open yourself up to the world rather than projecting out onto it.

Be vulnerable –When things get tough, you’re more likely to call someone who already knows your fears, your mistakes, and your dreams—someone with whom you’ve been vulnerable before. The necessary chit-chat of life can insulate you from having to let your authentic self out. Meaningful conversations are a part of real happiness because they require emotional vulnerability.

In another person’s acceptance of your vulnerability, you can also learn to accept yourself in your entirety. You stop needing to become the perfect, held-together, imaginary you.

Time to reflect – Meaningful conversations are a great way to process your shared and private experiences. It’s often when you talk about something you went through that the experience comes to have the most meaning for you. Maybe another person’s input will cause you to see things in a slightly different light.