The holidays are supposed to be filled with celebration, family, and joy.
However, if you are managing depression, during the holidays, your response might be, “Yeah, right.”
Depression and family do not often mix well at all.
There are the burdens that you already bring into the season, as well as how you are managing your depression. If you have been working on your treatment for a while, then you probably could manage through the holidays unfazed. Yet, if you are just starting to treat your depression, this is a fraught time indeed.
But it doesn’t have to all be doom and gloom.
Here are four straightforward tips for managing depression and family during the holidays.
1. Know What You’re Getting Into
Really, this should be: “Know what you’re getting into, but don’t hyper-focus on it!”
When it comes to depression and family, be honest with yourself and with the situation. For example, you have a parent that always insists on making a long-winded and embarrassing toast before eating. Or there is the aunt that is always so chatty, all the time!
So, before the holidays arrive, consider the situation you are getting yourself into. At the same time, though, avoid focusing so much on it that you work yourself up. Rather, turn it into a game. Try to predict which situations or behaviors will happen and see if they occur. This turns the holiday experience into an experiment and can actually help lighten the mood for you.
2. Practice Mindfulness… a Lot
To manage both depression and family dynamics, it will be important that you practice mindfulness… and more mindfulness.
Whether you are just stopping by for dinner or staying for a whole week, have some mindfulness tricks up your sleeve. For example, if you are just over for the evening, you might only need a moment to practice your breathing if you feel stress or anxiety coming on. However, longer stays require more tools at your disposal.
For instance, you could…
- Wake up early to have some quiet time alone
- Journal
- Go for a run or exercise at a gym
- Meditate
These mindfulness techniques help to create some space between you and your family. They allow you to recharge so that you can still stay centered when coping with your depression… and your family.
3. Keep a Supportive Friend Close at Hand
Let’s face it, it may still be a year until the election, but the ruckus has already started. With politics on so many people’s minds, there will inevitably be political discussions during the holidays.
The opinions of some of your relatives could be triggering for you. While that can be really tough, it helps to just admit that it is the reality of the situation. You know your relatives best. Would they be open to hearing your perspective and request not to touch that live wire? If not, then recognize that you can’t control other people, just as they cannot control you.
This is where having a support system in place helps a lot. Make sure you have a friend you can text or call at the ready. They can help you stay sane even when you fear things are going south.
4. Have an Escape Plan Ready
Just as you knew what you were getting into, have an escape plan ready just in case the unfortunate mix of depression and family gets to be too much for you. For instance, you could stay for dinner, but opt to leave early saying that you need to get your rest.
Remember, you don’t have to be blunt, even if some of your relatives are not blessed with the congeniality gene. You can be gracious with your exit while still taking care of yourself.
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Depression and family during the holidays can be a toxic combination. However, you don’t have to let it poison your spirit. Learning to manage your depression and applying the above-mentioned tips specifically for handling holiday family woes can help keep you mentally and emotionally healthy.
Moreover, depression treatment can give you an opportunity not only to prepare before the holidays start but also process after they are over. If you’re interested in knowing more, please contact me.
